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82 Funniest Racing Jokes for Fans and Non Fans Alike

Racing jokes are a niche form of humor that targets different types of racing sports and activities. Major themes of racing jokes play off baseline concepts and characteristics that are easy for everyone to understand. Consequently, the humor is palatable and widely accessible. A set-up for a racing joke occasionally relies on more in-depth knowledge of motorsports, race car drivers, and animal racing. However, the tone and themes of the quips employ recognizable wordplay and punchlines both fans and non-fans appreciate.

Best funny racing jokes
Racing jokes encompass all forms of racing humor, playing off universal themes fans and non-fans understand

The best racing jokes are structurally simple. The quips share common themes of racing like speed, winning, drivers, tracks, and competitions. Humourous one-liners, puns, names, and other forms of wordplay about racing follow the same method with room for more niche gags. Certain jokes, like those surrounding NASCAR or Formula 1 particularly, play on the fan and driver archetypes. Doing so adds an extra dimension to the punchline without discarding familiar ideas that everyone understands.

There is limited demand for racing jokes by being a niche form of humor. However, the quips are a straightforward style of comedy, making them worth sharing. You don’t need to be an expert to find jokes about barrel racing or bike racing humorous. The majority of funny racing jokes are versatile with a universal appeal playing off the concept of racing.

50 Best racing jokes

The best racing jokes cover a range of niches encompassing all forms of racing humor. A portion of the jokes focuses on competitive race sports, while others target cars and famous drivers, utilize clever wordplay, or combine racing with an unrelated topic. There are consequently many different types of funny racing jokes, allowing the humor to appeal to a large audience.

Many of the best racing jokes capture the love of racing and deliver a funny take that resonates with everybody. Most deliver a fast and furious punchline while successfully walking the line between intelligent humor, juvenile silliness, and universal comedic concepts. Jokes about racing are not deeply constrained by much specificity despite the niche topic. A few punchlines are better reserved for fans, but all funny racing jokes are good-natured jabs at basic concepts or similar subjects. The humor tackles niches about racing from all sides to be shared and enjoyed by competitors and spectators alike.

Below are fifty of the best racing jokes to get you revving with laughter.

Best racing jokes
Best racing jokes

1. I keep trying to watch racing on my computer, but every time I press the F1 key, it just opens a help window.

2. What do you get when dinosaur drivers crash their cars?
Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

3. Why do motorsport drivers have expert relationship advice?
They are trained to look for red flags.

4. Why should Microsoft, Intel, and Nvidia get into the motorsport business?
They already have the best drivers.

5. Motorsport drivers do not eat before a race, so they do not get Indy-gestion.

6. Why do DJs make terrible drivers?
They keep changing tracks.

7. Why are there no snowmen racing in F1?
Because they never make it through the warm-up.

8. Why do electric cars finish the race early?
Because they are on a short circuit.

9. What do you call a speedster made of French bread?
A Baguetti Veyron.

10. Why are snail speedsters painted with a big ‘S’ on the hood?
Because fans get to shout, “Look at that S-car go!”

11. What milk did Michael Schumacher feed his children?
Formula One.

12. Why do Matthew McConaughey fans make terrible NASCAR drivers?
Because they go al-right, al-right, al-right.

13. It is easy to tell when NASCAR fans watch Formula 1 events.
They tap you on the shoulder and ask, “Are we watching the qualifying?”

14. What did the racehorse say when it fell?
I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup.

15. Some racehorses are hanging out in a stable.
One of them starts to boast about his track record. “In the last 14 races, I’ve won seven of them!”
Another horse chimes in: “Well in the last 25 races, I’ve won 18!”
“That’s impressive, but in the last 35 races, I’ve won 28!” says another.
At this point, the horses notice a greyhound in the stable.
“I don’t mean to brag,” says the greyhound, “but in my last 80 races, I’ve won 78 of them!”
The horses are clearly amazed.
“Wow!” says one after a hushed silence. “A talking dog!”

16. Have you heard the one about the runaway racehorse?
It’s a terrible tale of WHOA.

17. How do you make a small fortune out of horses?
Start with a large fortune.

18. What is one of the hardest times to win a horse race?
12:31, because it is 29 to 1.

19. Why did the owner name his racehorse ‘Bad News’?
Because bad news travels fast.

20. Why was the racehorse feeling so stressed?
He was saddled with responsibility.

21. When do vampires like watching a horse race?
When it is neck to neck.

22. My annoying cousin keeps bragging about sleeping in a racecar bed.
Jokes on him. I sleep in a real car.

23. What song do racehorses like to listen to?
Watch me whip…watch me neigh, neigh.

24. I bet on a horse with excellent breeding. After the horse left the starting gate, he paused to close it behind him.

25. ‘One-One’ was a racehorse.
‘One-Two’ was one too.
One-One won one race,
and One-Two won one, too.

26. A racehorse owner takes his horse to the vet. “Will I be able to race this horse again?”
The vet replies: “Of course, you will, and you’ll probably win!”

27. What is the longest-running event?
The human race.

28. ”Who won the 1975 Formula 1 World Championship?”

29. Racecar backwards is still racecar.
But racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.

30. What do you call a bisexual racecar driver?
The fast and the curious

31. What do we want?
Racecar noises!!!
When do we want them?

32. If a piano player is called a pianist…
Shouldn’t a racecar driver be called a racist?

33. A racehorse breeder can’t seem to break into the competition, as no matter how hard he tries with his own horses, they’re never as fast as rival breeders.
One day, about to give up and sell his farm, he gets an idea. He spends months researching and breeding geese, and when the time is right, he takes them to the local derby and sets up a race.
To his surprise, people are more interested in the peculiar and never-before-seen geese races than in the horse races. People start betting money on the geese, and even the other horse breeders arrive to take a look.
At the end of the day, with more money in his wallet than he ever made on horses, he exclaims to the crowd: “My racing geese are the best, so come to my farm if you want to take a quick gander.”

34. My racehorse’s name is Mayo.
Sometimes, Mayo neighs.

35. A relay runner tried a new career as a baseball player.
It didn’t last long, as he kept passing the bat on.

36. Your Honor, we have tried to get the defendant to come to court, but he has a knack for running away.
He just keeps playing the race card.

37. What’s the difference between Nascar and F1?
The types of drinks served.

38. Why are road racing bikes so expensive?
If they were cheap, cyclists wouldn’t have something to hold over pedestrians.

39. What sort of racehorses come out after dark?

40. The rules of drag races are pretty straightforward to understand.

41. What’s the difference between a velodrome and a palindrome?
For one, you have to use a bicycle. For the other, you can use a race car.

42. “I tried horse racing once, but I fell at the first fence. I might have done better if I had a horse.”

43. Where did the Helsinki Marathon end?
At the Finnish line.

44. The other day, my favorite Formula 1 driver asked me if I needed a lift.
I said, “No thanks, I’m grand, but thanks, Verstappen.”

45. I’ve been doing some drag racing recently.
It’s quite the trans-sport.

46. What does the acronym NASCAR stand for?
Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks.

47. What do you get when you cross a racecar with a spud?
Crashed potatoes.

48. Why did the car get disqualified from the championship drag race?
No spoilers!

49. Elon Musk launched the Falcon Heavy hoping to start a space race…
Of course, he wants a space race; he’s the only one with a car up there.

50. Shopping at Costco or Sam’s Club is like driving a race car.
You go from $0 to $60 in a matter of seconds.

32 Jokes about racing

Jokes about racing cover the broad themes of racing, accounting for anything done fast. As a result, there are many possible playful themes or characters in the quips, such as animals and people racing or general motorsports talk. The advantage of jokes about racing is their universal appeal. Everybody understands the concept of a race. The first one wins; everybody else doesn’t. The easy-to-understand nature means the quips are likely to land whether they’re about bikes, cars, horses, or watching greyhounds—the underlying concept remains consistent regardless.

Best jokes about racing
Best jokes about racing

Below are five funny jokes about racing that everybody gets.

51. What is the racing driver’s least favorite meal?

52. What is the difference between praying in church and on the race track?
On the track, you mean it.

53. Teacher: racecar
{10 years later}
Boy: [bursting out of the bank in ski mask] Where’s the palindrome?
Getaway driver: [sitting in kayak]…

54. What is a stoner’s favorite racing game?
Need for Weed.

55. I was in a bar the other day when a girl asked me, “What do you do?”
I responded, “I race cars.”
Screeching with excitement, she shot back, “Do you win many races!?”
I sighed, “No, the cars are much faster…”

What are the best Formula 1 jokes?

Formula 1 jokes are a sub-niche of racing jokes. Formula 1 is the most watched motorsport in the world, making for a wide scope of jokes and wordplay. The popularity of the race car sport means the humor is relatable, so even if you’re not a fan of motorsports, you are likely to understand the humor. Furthermore, Formula 1 racing jokes play on two elements that are easy to understand and execute. Firstly, Formula 1 is all about the cars. Both race cars and, by extension, drivers are at the forefront of the jokes. Secondly, Formula 1 is about speed. The quips combine cars and speed to deliver a playful punchline that resonates with fans and casual watchers.

Below are four examples of Formula 1 jokes guaranteed to deliver a laugh.

56. Why do Swiss drivers have the least number of Formula 1 victories?
Because they are always in neutral.

57. What do strippers and the best F1 drivers have in common?
They start events in pole position.

58. Guy 1: I think it’s great that fast food companies are sponsoring big racing circuits now, but you have to admit—The Nurburgerkingring is a bit of a mouthful.
Guy 2: I think that’s the point.

59. You know about Michael Schumacher’s racing career, but did you know that he and two friends also owned a tailor’s store?
Weirdly, they were all named Michael. Michael Schumacher, Michael Dressmacher, and Michael Coatmacher.

Formula 1 puns

Formula 1 puns are an extension of funny racing jokes that create punchlines through wordplay and racing terms. Puns require linguistic dexterity and detailed knowledge of the sport to successfully craft. However, the punchlines are easy to understand and thus appeal to everyone with a funny bone, including non-fans. Adding to the charm of Formula 1 puns is their reliability. Wordplay, which puns rely on, is an important facet of humor and one of the earliest comedy stylings we encounter as children growing up. Therefore, the humor resonates universally. Pun humor is often laughed off as juvenile, but both racing jokes in general and Formula 1 puns capitalize on the silly nostalgic quality of punning to connect with a broad audience.

Below are three examples of Formula 1 puns that are pit-stop-perfect.

60. “My girlfriend bet me I couldn’t make an F1 car out of spaghetti… You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.”

61. What do you call it when you hit a Formula 1 driver?
Max Verslappen.

62. What is Catwoman’s favorite racing game?
Gran Purr-ismo.

What are the best NASCAR jokes?

NASCAR jokes consist of humor about the American stock car association. The category of racing jokes differs from other quips because NASCAR is not just about going fast. Crashes and wrecks are engrained into the sport and are considered part of the entertainment factor. Thematically, NASCAR jokes throw silly but good-natured shade at the sport’s fans in a self-deprecating manner that other motorsport humor does not. However, the best jokes about NASCAR are those that strike the right balance between generality and specificity. The humor consists of set-ups and punchlines anybody could understand regardless of whether they are diehards of the sport or not.

Best NASCAR jokes
Funniest NASCAR jokes

Below are four great NASCAR jokes to throw you for a humorous loop.

63. Why did the zombie come last in the NASCAR race?
He left his foot on the brakes.

64. You get the lead only when you need fuel.

65. Why are NASCAR tracks oval?
The fans have trouble keeping up with more complicated shapes.

66. If Robert Pressley, John Andretti, and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the boat sank, who would be saved?
Half the cars in Sunday’s Race.

Funny NASCAR fantasy names

Funny NASCAR fantasy names are a category of racing humor that incorporate puns. The fantasy names use a play on words to create clever NASCAR fantasy team names. Consequently, the names are niche but the quips rely on puns and basic concepts of racing, making the category of humor easy for everyone to understand. Additionally, punny names are a staple comedic ingredient for any team-based sport. NASCAR is no exception. Coming up with funny NASCAR fantasy names is not going to land you the plaudits of your race-loving buddies, but it sure is a fun thing to do while having a couple of cold ones on race day.

Below are four funny NASCAR fantasy names to entertain your friends during the next safety lap.

67. 4 Lefts Make it Right.

68. Ace of Race.

69. Baby Got Track.

70. Deez Lug Nuts!

What are the funniest drag racing jokes?

The best drag racing jokes consist of silly humor about the high-speed motor racing sport. The format of drag-racing jokes is relatively uncomplicated. The set-ups and punchlines are simple and direct, very much like the sport they are made around. As a result, comics don’t have to worry about the jokes being lost in translation as the themes are comprehensible for a general audience.

Below are three drag racing jokes guaranteed to crack you up.

71. Did you hear about the incontinent communist drag racer?
His name is Skid Marx.

72. “I went to a drag race last Saturday. I still can’t believe the guy in high heels won.”

73. My friend invited me to go drag racing with him, and I thought yeah, that sounds fun.
Turns out it is really freaking hard to run in heels.

What are the best horse racing jokes and one-liners?

Horse racing jokes are a subset of humor that stands out from other quips on our list because it doesn’t focus on race cars. The topic of horses and racing allows for a broad collection touching on different humor styles. For example, the quips fall under corny humor due to the horse wordplay, set-ups, and punchlines. Additionally, horse racing is a lucrative sport that not everyone is familiar with. However, a horse race joke employs playful themes and baseline concepts anyone understands just as race car humor does. Consequently, horse racing jokes and one-liners resonate with everyone, regardless of their familiarity with the sport.

Below are five horse racing jokes and one-liners that ensure you never get off to a false start.

74. Did you hear what happened at the racetrack yesterday?
One horse was so slow, they had to pay the jockey overtime.

75. What does it mean when you find a horseshoe on the ground?
Some poor horse is walking around in socks.

76. What disease are racehorses most scared of getting?
Hay fever.

77. What kind of medicine do you give a sick racehorse?
Cough stirrup.

78. I bet on a horse to come in 25 to 1, and it did! The only problem is that all the other horses left at 12:30.

The greatest barrel racing joke

Barrel racing jokes concern playful jabs about barrel races at the rodeo and the sport in general. These jokes are a more niche line of humor with specific themes meant for rodeo fans. However, barrel racing jokes are still palatable and easily understood if executed well. Furthermore, it’s never a bad idea to have some rare jokes in your repertoire, just in case the moment ever arises that you need them.

Below is a barrel racing joke courtesy of the American TV show, Yellowstone.

79. A guy that goes to see a doctor? And the doctor says, “I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you got cancer and only have one week to live.”
The man says, “A week, that’s not enough time! Doc, you gotta do something. I need more than a week.”
The doctor thinks, sits down, and says, “I’ll tell you what to do. Go find yourself a barrel racer girl with two little dogs, and you marry her.”
“That’s gonna make me live longer?” the man asks.
“No,” the doctor replies, “but it’ll make that week feel like a fucking eternity.”

What are the best bike racing jokes?

Bike racing jokes relate to any joke involving a race on two wheels. The best bike racing jokes are simple and traditionally use punchlines that are obvious but unexpected. Humor concerning bike sports is less common than their four-wheeled or four-legged counterparts. However, the jokes deliver a strong laugh as, just as race car or horse racing jokes do, the concepts are largely basic, silly, and easy to understand even if you’re not a fan.

Below are three bike racing jokes to help you shift through the comedy geas.

80. Did you hear about the environmentalist who did the same bicycle race twice?
He re-cycled.

81. What do you call a hippo entering the Tour de France?

82. Do you know the hardest thing about wiping out just before you cross the finish line?
The road.

What are racing jokes?

Racing jokes are a type of humor that revolves around the world of racing in all its forms. Humor about motorsports, animal racing, and basic concepts and mechanics of racing and race tracks make up the main themes. The involved set-ups and punchlines are typically quick and to the point, just like the activities that they’re based on. Funny racing jokes often rely on puns and wordplay to get a laugh, making them an effective way to inject a little humor into any conversation about racing.

One of the major advantages of a racing joke is that they’re accessible to everyone, regardless of how much they know about sports or the concepts involved. You’re able to appreciate the humor even if you’re not a fan of racing, and if you are, you’ll probably find them even funnier because of familiar concepts.

What are some racing slang terms?

Racing slang terms are phrases and expressions that relate almost exclusively to the racing world. Some terms are universal to racing, while others are more specific to a particular type of race such as cycling, NASCAR, or Formula 1.

Below are ten racing slang terms you really need to know.

Backmarker: A backmarker is the term used to describe a slower car that is often lapped during the race.

Downforce: Downforce is the aerodynamic force exerted on cars traveling at speed. Downforce is what makes cars “stick” to the ground.

Oversteer: Oversteer is a term used when the car turns more than the driver expected. The sensitivity of the steering mechanics governs this and varies from car to car.

Understeer: Understeer is the opposite of Oversteer and is used to describe a car that responds less than the driver expected when steering.

Pits: The pits are an area at a racetrack that houses the team garages.

Rodder: A rodder is someone who prefers to race and avoid crashes.

Wrecker: A wrecker is a driver who prefers to entertain through crashing and has little interest in winning races.

Scrutineering: A series of technical and safety checks that are regularly performed to ensure that every team is complying with current regulations.

Wheels up the cage: Wheels up the cage is a term used when a car’s back wheels are up in the air.

Slipstreaming: Slipstreaming is when a car tucks behind the car in front when traveling on a straight. The low pressure behind the front car means the trailing car uses less power to maintain its speed. Cars will often slipstream ahead of trying to overtake.

Hanging it out: Hanging it out describes the act of drifting a rear-wheel drive around a bend.

What are the funniest racing quotes and sayings?

Below are ten of the best and funniest racing quotes and sayings from around the world.

“To achieve anything in this game, you must be prepared to dabble in the boundary of disaster.”
— Sterling Moss

“No, no, he didn’t slam you, he didn’t bump you, he didn’t nudge you… he rubbed you. And rubbin, son, is racin’.” — Harry Hogge, Days of Thunder

“The crashes people remember, but drivers remember the near misses.” — Mario Andretti

“There have been other tracks that separated the men from the boys. This is the track that will separate the brave from the weak after the boys are gone.” Driver Jimmy Thompson speaking about Daytona International Speedway

“Aerodynamics is for people who can’t build engines.” — Enzo Ferrari

“You win some; you lose some, and you wreck some.” — Dale Earnhardt Sr

“Moonshiners put more time, energy, thought, and love into their cars than any racer ever will. Lose on the track, and you go home. Lose with a load of whiskey, and you go to jail.” Junior Johnson, NASCAR legend and former whiskey runner

“After the third flip, I lost control…” Don Roberts after crashing in the Jade Grenade at New England Dragway in 1975

“The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it, which is identical.” F1 commentator Murray Walker

“The winner ain’t the one with the fastest car; it’s the one who refuses to lose.” Dale Earnhardt